What's Wrong With You?

We live in a world of information overload - the 24-hour news cycle has seen to that. We have to know everything, from everywhere, as soon as it happens. And so it goes with medicines and maladies. Seems we have to attach a name and a medication to every ache and pain, cough and sniffle. And we're just hypochondriacal enough to believe whatever the drug companies tell us is wrong with us.

Take, for instance, the "alphabetical diseases". There's PAD, COPD, and RLS, just to name a few. For you novices out there, that's Peripheral Artery Disease, Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disorder, and Restless Leg Syndrome. Fortunately, medication is available for the treatment of all of these ailments. I know because I saw them advertised between two episodes of Dancing with the Stars. If you don't think we're gullible, how do you think the drug companies pay for those prime-time television ads? I tell you, there's gold in them thar pills!

And we've changed a few names just to keep you guessing. You aren't sad anymore - you suffer from depression. You don't have heartburn or indigestion - you have acid reflux disease. You don't have aches and pains - you have fibromyalgia. And you don't have gas and an upset stomach - you have irritable bowel syndrome.

Maybe it's just me, but it seems like we're coming up with diseases to fit the medication. Sort of like buying a suit to match a tie, in my opinion. Did we miss all this stuff in years past? I mean, we had some pretty smart folks around in the last century - Jonas Salk to name one. Are you telling me that he came up with a vaccine for polio without once giving any thought to the heartbreak caused by Restless Leg Syndrome? What was he thinking? Where are his priorities?

I guess I miss the days when we were ignorant of some of the illnesses around us. According to my mother, there were only two things that could happen to you when you were a kid. You could "put your eye out" or you could "break your neck." Past that, you were home free. And even when I was older, you had your choice of cold, flu, or sore throat. That was pretty much it. Any thing past that and they had to remove something (i.e. gall bladder, appendix, or tonsils).

So when you see ads for Advair, Plavix, or Nexium, don't go looking for symptoms that you didn't even know existed. Take control. If your legs start feeling restless, just get up and walk around. A few trips to the frig and you'll forget all about it - without so much as a single co-pay.

Till next time..........